Every Experience is a Good Experience

Every experience is a good experience; the good and the bad; it’s all good after all.

Or so I believe.

This is a sentence I find myself often repeating in different contexts on different occasions.

It is a conclusion I have drawn from my own experiences and other people’s stories and anecdotes that I continually observe and learn from. It is derived from all the encounters I have stumbled upon in books, movies and real life. I have always come to find that, in the end, every occurrence proves to be good and useful after all.

This is not a lecture about positive thinking and about seeing the glass half full. This is more of a logical rationalization and deep understanding of why things happen to us the way they do. Many questions and speculations go around in our tiny minds that we need answers to: what purpose we serve in life; why we meet certain people; why we walk certain paths; why we get or don’t get what we want when we want it; why and how Karma always finds us to handsomely recompense us or to slap us in the face; etc. We question every bad experience and ask “why?”, yet, we rarely contemplate logically to understand what message is being sent to us.

Our experiences are translated into feelings that go deep in our guts. The more we are aware of the link between the experience and the feeling – or set of feelings – associated with it, the more we are able to decipher our inner gates to places that we’ve never been before. As we open more gates inside of us, we expand the knowledge of our “self”. The more we know this self, the more things add up in our mind and start to make sense. Then, our questions start to find answers one at a time. Eventually, we start to envisage clearer pictures in our mind about our self, others and the world around us. Then, we start to feel an urge to dive deeper and learn more to find peace.

Finding peace within oneself is a rare gift that one might attain during a lifetime. Many are those who cannot find it and struggle while not knowing what it is that maims their lives.

Running away from our experiences and living in denial keeps the anger locked down inside our guts. This anger then tries to free itself in the shape of demons haunting us throughout our days and nights, hurting us and hurting others. Yet, anger never manages to escape on its own; we have to set it free knowingly, willingly, and voluntarily. We do that when we learn the lesson, grasp it, make peace with it, forgive and be forgiven, and then turn the page to the next chapter.

Today, I believe that each and every encounter has left an impression on me. The sort of impression that carves its marks in my mind and my soul so vividly – just like ancient manuscripts carved in stone. In fact, I am what I am today because of these very experiences. The good and the bad, especially the bad.

Every experience is good because every experience is a good lesson. Lessons can be harsh, painful, or hard to learn, but in the end they teach us. Throughout this learning process we get to know ourselves and others. Eventually, understanding our own feelings and experiences helps us understand others and sympathize with them. We become better family members, better friends, better lovers, and above all better humans.

Author: Lama Lawand